Mastering Human Connection

Michael Laitman
3 min readMar 19, 2021

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The world is advancing towards a more interconnected state, towards reciprocity and integration. One who already perceives this trend of development can pass along to others the spirit of connection. We bear witness to the signs of humanity’s ripening process which has been accelerated by the pandemic. Complete maturity will be reached only when we rise to the level of love of others. The transition period toward it can be either painful or pleasant depending on our level of willing participation in ushering in that positive change.

How can we yield ideal results in our human relationships and cohesion? First of all it is important to realize that every person acts as a type of receiver and transmitter. We constantly receive messages, process them within ourselves, and transmit them. So when I start thinking about good connections and complementary relationships between people, a field of positive feeling already spreads around me, even without words.

Until now, we have let our inborn selfish nature dominate our thoughts and actions in life. The more we continue in that direction the more we distance ourselves from the essential unifying law of nature, which leads to everyone’s suffering as the division proliferates. Thus, the ongoing virus outbreak is conducting us towards a more conscious society, one that is aware of our interdependence so that our aspirations for a better future bear fruit.

How can we yield ideal results in our human relationships and cohesion? First of all it is important to realize that every person acts as a type of receiver and transmitter. We constantly receive messages, process them within ourselves, and transmit them. So when I start thinking about good connections and complementary relationships between people, a field of positive feeling already spreads around me, even without words.

Moreover, in order to increase the positive impact in the circles among which we move throughout life, first and foremost we need to assess our surrounding environment. This means we need to check the current situation of the people we associate with, the state they aspire to reach, what they would consider success, and how they define a good future. Then, we need to build an outreach action plan based on that vision that is tailored to them and offer to deepen the mutual connection as a means of helping them realize those goals.

This kind of sensitivity to the needs and aspirations of others is relevant in our relations with our children and family members, as well as with friends and colleagues at work. It might also be related to improved health, career and business success, to better relationships — in reality, to anything and everything. Whatever the exact situation, the principle is always the same: first understand where the people are and what they are aiming for, and then think about how to demonstrate them that through good connections between people around can they achieve their goals.

In order to better understand what is meant by the word “connection”, let’s consider the family circle for the sake of illustration. What does a connected family look like? It is a place where everyone feels open to each other, willing to understand and support each other, without having to defend or hide from anyone. A family must be a unit in which the atmosphere is like a warm, gentle cloud encircling everyone.

If we want to broaden our perspective, we can go one step further and try to envisage how differently our country would be run with this connection-focused approach. If people could sit together and connect in the same way as within a family, our societies would behave in a vastly different manner. Instead of fighting from morning to evening in such ruthless ways, there would be more peaceful interactions between us every step of the way.

What can move us towards a state of emotional closeness and harmony despite all the legitimate disagreements? Each of us as a “connection cultivator” must constantly put before his or her eyes one principle: in order to influence someone for the better, I must first connect with the person in sympathy, praise, and understanding, while thinking together how to further improve mutual care and reciprocity. In other words, we each must put into practice love of others to create the most fertile ground for a gratifying existence.

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Michael Laitman
Michael Laitman

Written by Michael Laitman

PhD in Philosophy and Kabbalah. MSc in Medical Bio-Cybernetics. Founder and president of Bnei Baruch Kabbalah Education & Research Institute.

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